The winter of 2008 was ending in Lake Tahoe. A dear friend of mine called me one day asking me to take her to church because she needed some help. If you read my previous post, my mom had just left and my journey with God was just in the beginning so I was really glad and willing to help her. I had no idea that I was actually the one being helped and my life was about to change big time.
The church we went to was in Sacramento (2 hours away) and no matter how the weather was, snowing or not, we were there and eager to learn.
The more you learn about Jesus, the more you learn about our wicked selves. Psalms 119:105 says “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path”. As I started learning from Him, I started recognizing the areas of my life that I needed to change. Things I didn’t think were wrong before, were now exposed to me and I needed to stop doing them in order to have communion and a relationship with God. And believe me, it was not easy.
My ex-husband didn’t like the fact that I was going to church and actually putting in practice what I was learning. I didn’t want to drink anymore, I stopped smoking weed and I was trying to make him stop with that lifestyle too. That’s when we started growing apart.
Did you know there are 3573 promises in the Bible? I didn’t count them…Google showed me. Three thousand five hundred and seventy three! Do you believe God? So why won’t you believe ALL of His promises were made for you too? It takes faith to do that. And how do we “get” faith? The Bible tells us in Romans 10:17 ” So faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ”.
Unfortunately we get so caught up in our busy lives that we don’t have time to read our Bibles to get to know Our creator and all of the promises He has for us and we get used to live a life that doesn’t produce much fruit.
Back to my story, things got really bad and the more I prayed for God to restore my marriage, the more we grew apart. I couldn’t understand why God wouldn’t do something. Why would he let us fall apart? Doesn’t he hate divorce (Malachi 2:16)? But then I finally understood. He gave us free will. Free will to choose what we want for our lives. Good or bad. And I chose to marry my first husband knowing how he was, the way he was. My mistake was that I wanted to change him. And I couldn’t. We can’t expect to change anyone. My heart was breaking.
When I finally accepted that maybe we were not meant to be for each other (that was one of the hardest things for God to change in my heart) things started to change and I moved out from Tahoe.
Sometimes things don’t happen according to what we wished or hoped for. Sometimes God’s NO is a blessing that you might not be able to see it yet. Don’t loose hope. Jesus said in John 15: “If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing…If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.”
We got divorced in 2010. Those two years were the hardest years of my life but I experienced such a heavenly joy while going through it that its hard to explain. During that period I felt His presence the most. He became my everything. My provider, my best-friend, my rock. “For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:10.
God was so faithful to me that 8 months later in 2011, I was getting married to the love of my life. The man God designed for me to have. He was not a christian when we met and his testimony is so amazing that I will have to share it here soon! Faith can move mountains my friends! Remember the 3573 promises in the Bible? They started to come true in my life. And I pray that they will never stop!
So what are you waiting for? Be intentional about this. You only have one life to live. Get a Bible, start reading it. Find a Bible-based church. Give it a try and taste how amazing it is to have a relationship with Jesus!
To His Glory,