“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” Corinthians 13:13

I was 7 years old when my mom told me that my dad was not my biological father. I can say that I don’t remember exactly how I felt at the time. I remember seeing my sister crying and I actually think I was numbed. Sometimes God will do that to us. He knows what we can and what we can not handle. I loved my father. For a brief moment I thought I was going to loose him. I felt lost. Weird and hard to explain it but maybe that fact molded me in ways that now when I look back it all make sense.

My mother not only told me, but she told my dad and my biological father as well. Not really sure how my dad reacted to it in closed doors but the only thing I can remember is my mom telling me that his first response after she told him was saying : “SHE IS MY DAUGHTER”.
We lived life as that never happened.
I don’t need to say that the love that man gave to me was by far better than a lot of biological fathers out there giving to their own child.
Romans 8:28, says that everything works for the good of those who love God” and that act of love, little did my dad know, was what was going to give him his eternal life with our Lord Jesus.
I was in Brazil, 18 years old and living with my sister and my dad at the time. My mother was still recovering from her illness (I’ll talk about her journey on another post) and life was as good as it gets. I was in college to get my Business Bachelor Degree and my life consisted in going to the gym, eat healthy foods, watch my dad play his gigs (he was an excellent singer and guitar player) and study.
It was November 13th of 2001. How could I forget this day? 6 years prior, in 1995, we had the terrible news that my half-brother had passed in a terrible car accident. He was 21 years old and was going to get married a month later. (Another subject for another post).
As good catholics, my family had a mass every year for my brothers soul.
We were all there and I asked my dad about his doctors appointment and he said he had to cancel it because of the mass. My dad was not in a good shape. His body was giving all the signs that something was about to happen. I went home and he went to his rehearsal with his band.
It was around 9pm and I went to my room to sleep. I heard my father getting back home and my sister’s boyfriend leaving. Suddenly my sister wakes me up screaming that my father had passed out. I went to his room and saw him laying on his bed. I jumped on top him and started performing CPR and at the same time telling my sister to call 911 and my uncle that lived blocks away.
My dad comes back. Very weak but he looks at me. The Holy Sprit took it from there. I started telling him about Jesus. I was saying: “Think about Jesus dad, think about Jesus.” What in the world was I saying? My mom had become a Christian around 10 years earlier and she took me to church sometimes so I learned about Jesus from her but I knew too little to say that to him. It was totally the Holy Spirit. I remember him looking at me and trying to say Jesus but he was very weak and in pain.
I’m not going to get into much details but unfortunately, the ambulance and 911 system in Brazil are not the best so they took around 30 minutes to get there and needless to say, my dad couldn’t make it. He passed from a heart attack on that night. The same night he lost his only son.
That sound a little harsh right? But what if I tell you when I tell this story to people I see a happy ending? You think I’m crazy or a cold person probably… But no,  what I see is how God’s promises are ALL true.
1Peter 4:8 says: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”
And that is exactly what happened to my father.
He loved me and took me as his daughter, even knowing I was not his. He went over his pride and just loved me unconditionally. He could have acted different, he could have loved me less, but no…he choose to love me. His love was greater and his love gave him his eternal life.
Not only that but this whole episode gave me even more sense of belonging. Jeremiah 1:5 says: “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you…” so God knew that my mom was going to conceive me and He used me…again ME, to ask my father to accept Jesus when he was having his last breath.
How amazing is that?
To His Glory,
Fernanda

 

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